crappy idiot boyfriend!!!!
so yeah, yesteday he brokeup wiht me. now im all depressing and like because of it. at least school is cheering me up a bit. sigh. this sucks. he didnt even explain himself clearly. gahhhh well im goign to the myo concert in 2 weeks and so we'll see each other then. by then ill also have all my anger built up to whack him in hte face with. at least thats what i believe. so what ever. but i miss him. and tomorrows my bday. we were supose to have a date!!!! gahhhh. he upsets me and now im all depressing again. i have a depressing playlist on my mp3. it consists of....well depressing songs. most depressing and the best out of all of them is Say Goodbye -Skillet sad deressing osng. perfect for break ups. of yeah to get rid of my excesive depression i wrote a depressign short story. i ususlly do that when im really pissed or depressed. either a story or poem. poems appear more when im pissed off or depressed still i guess. but i wrote a story this time. ih yeah the story has nothign to do with my real intentions.
Its cold. Here in the dark I feel cold. I feel empty. I see and sense the poepl around me, the food and sights and sounds. It is noisy but I don’t hear it. Its cold up here. I see people going to and fro. They are following their dreams, or their fate. Some have a boring job and some are extremely happy. Maybe they are the ones who stole my sole. But i know that’s not what happened. He did. He sotle it. Sucked it out of me. And that’s what brought me here. I have no clue if he knows or not. This was our spot. Our spot. Where we would sit and talk. Sit and just be with each other. But now he’s not here and it feels colder. Colder than I’ve ever been. It looks warmer over there so maybe I’ll go. It seems far but ill reach there in no time. Maybe just maybe if I get warm again I’ll be able to get him back. Just maybe. Yeah I just ill go get that heat. The warm fuzz.
GIRL FOUND DEAD. SUICIDE ATTEMPT.
and there you have it. i will nto committ suicide. never thougt about it. and so yeah. im gonna go mup around now and drown my sorrows in music and anime. watchuign hot guys always cheers me up. actually i think ill watch chinese drama. thier drama is so over the top that mine feels so little and i laugh at dramas alot of the time.
~POLKA DOT**
Friday, April 30, 2010
Thursday, April 22, 2010
shake that thing.....or not- DAY 13? or is it 14 already
LONG HAIR SHORT HAIR MEDIUM HAIR TOO. I LOVE ALL OF IT AND I LOVE YOU!
i know you love it. anyway sooo. ive realised i really do want to become a hair stylist or hair designer or hair cutter etc. since young ive liked playign wiht hiar. see i used to play with my moms hair alllll the time it was really funa dn half the time it wasnt bad but sometimes i would go crazy and have palm trees all over. that was also when my mom had more hair, its cause shes getting older so her hair is thinner. and her hair is REALLY thin to begin with so there like no hair left for me to play with. i have to find a new victim......mwahahhahaha...hmmm maybe ill target laura, she has nice think straight german hair. she' german and smells german and the other day her hoiuse smelled like PASTA! ok off topic. anyway i really like playing with hair. now the down fall..... hair dresser dont make much money. unless you become proskills and are like BAM! and everyone wants thier hair cut by you. but hey maybe im some genius hair cutter but i dont know it yet. you never know.
oh yeah, other than the fact i LOVE playign with hair i feel a connection to the hair stylist drama and the hair stylist manga ive read and watched. like i want ot be like them. i want to make people pretty. i could care less if i did... well actually no i do caare but i dont have the money to be fabulosa so im not but i have wanted to. so yeah. in the future i become a low wage fashion person i.e. fashion stuff or hair stuff or desgining stuff. or i become a well paid business person i.e. accountant, manager, finacial advisor, real estate agent. so yeah i would PREFER to do hair and fashion but i need the mulas($$$$) and business people generally do better in that money making catergory. so yeah ill decide sme other day. whatever. anyway till next time
oh yeah my birthday party is this weekend. YAY! i believe i have 36 poeple coming with maybe +2 and then next saturday is my realy birthday MAY 1st! ok now ill say bye. BYEEE!!!
~POLKA DOT**
i know you love it. anyway sooo. ive realised i really do want to become a hair stylist or hair designer or hair cutter etc. since young ive liked playign wiht hiar. see i used to play with my moms hair alllll the time it was really funa dn half the time it wasnt bad but sometimes i would go crazy and have palm trees all over. that was also when my mom had more hair, its cause shes getting older so her hair is thinner. and her hair is REALLY thin to begin with so there like no hair left for me to play with. i have to find a new victim......mwahahhahaha...hmmm maybe ill target laura, she has nice think straight german hair. she' german and smells german and the other day her hoiuse smelled like PASTA! ok off topic. anyway i really like playing with hair. now the down fall..... hair dresser dont make much money. unless you become proskills and are like BAM! and everyone wants thier hair cut by you. but hey maybe im some genius hair cutter but i dont know it yet. you never know.
oh yeah, other than the fact i LOVE playign with hair i feel a connection to the hair stylist drama and the hair stylist manga ive read and watched. like i want ot be like them. i want to make people pretty. i could care less if i did... well actually no i do caare but i dont have the money to be fabulosa so im not but i have wanted to. so yeah. in the future i become a low wage fashion person i.e. fashion stuff or hair stuff or desgining stuff. or i become a well paid business person i.e. accountant, manager, finacial advisor, real estate agent. so yeah i would PREFER to do hair and fashion but i need the mulas($$$$) and business people generally do better in that money making catergory. so yeah ill decide sme other day. whatever. anyway till next time
oh yeah my birthday party is this weekend. YAY! i believe i have 36 poeple coming with maybe +2 and then next saturday is my realy birthday MAY 1st! ok now ill say bye. BYEEE!!!
~POLKA DOT**
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
THIS IS CRAPS!!!!!! -DAY 13
CRAPS LIKE FALLING RAIN
yeha so what if i forgot to put day blahblah blah last post i dont freakign care rightnow!!!1. THIS SUCKS CRAP!
sooooooo, my two favourtite things that i do are coniciding. this is crap... abstrac tans softball are at hte same times....LITERALY. games are on tues and thurs and abstract rehersals are tues and thurs. and the same itmes too!!! its not like the game starts at like 2 and we're done by like 4 NO! the game is at 3:30pm WHO IN THE WORLD SCHEDULED THIS!!!! gahhhh. and ms emmett says i HAVE to be at abstract for an hour AT LEAST! so i was like what if i came at 4:30 she like no. wat the heck no mercy much. this is crappy crappy crappy crappy. so i have to choose now. humph..... i dotn want to choose. i wasn tto play sofball but i want to go to ottawa!. yeah, abstrac tis goign to ottawa and I WANNA GOOOOO!!!! but i dont want to miss softball. this is so retarded.
so what the heck am i supose to do....choose choose choose... -_- i dont want to choose. not at all. yeah sure im in like 3 bands, morning band, concert band, and jazz band, and abstract isnt REALLY neccessary so i COULD quit. but i still want to go to ottawa. *sigh* so hard to choose. i hate choosing. im very indesisive. whatever im getting somewhat kicked off the computer by ms narang but i could care less. w/e im goign to go do lens problems to drown my sorrows bye
~POLKA DOTS**
yeha so what if i forgot to put day blahblah blah last post i dont freakign care rightnow!!!1. THIS SUCKS CRAP!
sooooooo, my two favourtite things that i do are coniciding. this is crap... abstrac tans softball are at hte same times....LITERALY. games are on tues and thurs and abstract rehersals are tues and thurs. and the same itmes too!!! its not like the game starts at like 2 and we're done by like 4 NO! the game is at 3:30pm WHO IN THE WORLD SCHEDULED THIS!!!! gahhhh. and ms emmett says i HAVE to be at abstract for an hour AT LEAST! so i was like what if i came at 4:30 she like no. wat the heck no mercy much. this is crappy crappy crappy crappy. so i have to choose now. humph..... i dotn want to choose. i wasn tto play sofball but i want to go to ottawa!. yeah, abstrac tis goign to ottawa and I WANNA GOOOOO!!!! but i dont want to miss softball. this is so retarded.
so what the heck am i supose to do....choose choose choose... -_- i dont want to choose. not at all. yeah sure im in like 3 bands, morning band, concert band, and jazz band, and abstract isnt REALLY neccessary so i COULD quit. but i still want to go to ottawa. *sigh* so hard to choose. i hate choosing. im very indesisive. whatever im getting somewhat kicked off the computer by ms narang but i could care less. w/e im goign to go do lens problems to drown my sorrows bye
~POLKA DOTS**
Friday, April 9, 2010
Softball, rain, and no shine
I'M COLLDDD!!!!
yeah thats what i kept syaign yesterday. there was the time when we(me and 5 friends) were playing and i wasnt cold. it was raining, on and off. so i got wet. my pens also got wet and leaked in my bag. so now my yellow bag is kinda blue...not much tho thankfully. but yeah it was fun...except for the rain and no sun. but fun.... today at lunch we (same me and freind mayeb minus 2/plus 1)
well.. im in history right now and weve been watching a series of videos...quite boring i might say, and i shoudl realy pay attention cause i havent been and should, need ot pull marks up, theyve been falling all year...i think it started with english...mr.parker is such a bore. at leats my math mark is still high. i can at least count on that. and music. that was a good mark too. specking of classes i should og and switch my history class for a gr 12 math casue i plan to take phiosophy in gr 12. and if i dotn awitch the history fo rmath next year i wont be able to take the philosophy class/maybe fashion if next year's fashion class is any good. fashion really wont help m ein un casue i dont plan on pursuing it but i doubt philosophy will do any good either....i should go take a management course.
anyways.... i dont know....ran out of things to say for now...this usually doesnt happen. oh well till next time when i actually have somethign to say. ta ta
~POLKA DOT**
yeah thats what i kept syaign yesterday. there was the time when we(me and 5 friends) were playing and i wasnt cold. it was raining, on and off. so i got wet. my pens also got wet and leaked in my bag. so now my yellow bag is kinda blue...not much tho thankfully. but yeah it was fun...except for the rain and no sun. but fun.... today at lunch we (same me and freind mayeb minus 2/plus 1)
well.. im in history right now and weve been watching a series of videos...quite boring i might say, and i shoudl realy pay attention cause i havent been and should, need ot pull marks up, theyve been falling all year...i think it started with english...mr.parker is such a bore. at leats my math mark is still high. i can at least count on that. and music. that was a good mark too. specking of classes i should og and switch my history class for a gr 12 math casue i plan to take phiosophy in gr 12. and if i dotn awitch the history fo rmath next year i wont be able to take the philosophy class/maybe fashion if next year's fashion class is any good. fashion really wont help m ein un casue i dont plan on pursuing it but i doubt philosophy will do any good either....i should go take a management course.
anyways.... i dont know....ran out of things to say for now...this usually doesnt happen. oh well till next time when i actually have somethign to say. ta ta
~POLKA DOT**
Sunday, April 4, 2010
Anime Anime and more Anime- DAY 11
ANIME MARATHON!!!!
yesterday i went to izzas housie and we had na anime marthong. fun fun fun!!!
we watched the whole season of shangri-la, all 24 episodes. we also had a crisis while watchign that. so we finished episode 20 adn the aniem stoped. at first i thought it was just that i had the other eps by a diff subbers casue when u click on an ep it puts all aimilar eps in a play list. so i check and i didnt have them, so i checked m external hardrive to see if it just didnt copy properly or something. THEY WERENT THERE EITHER. WE DIDNT HAVE THE LAST 4 EPISODES. now this is a big thing, it like just ending so we NEEDED the last 4 episodes. so we ended up goign to her basement, takign the internet wire and pluging it in my laptop and download the last 3 eps and watch one online.
yes that is what we call a crisis. durign the anime marthon we had pocky, pandas, instant noodles, and pizza. YUMMYYY!!! we also watched after shangi-la, two eps of happy lesson, club to death dokuro-chan, and howl's moving castle. ok big shocker here. IZZA HAD NEVER WATCHED HOWL'S MOVING CASTLE!!! haowl's movign castle is like classic anime movie. EVERYONE has watched howl. EVERYONE! so it was like *gasp* and so we watched it but them my parents picked me up 10 minutes before the end so it was like hahaha sucker. and so izza had to watch the end by herself on the internet :P overall very fun day, it was also izza's first aniem marathon.
other than that, I FINISHED MY AMV!!!! i have said that so many times alreayd to people but im sayign it again anyway. I FINISHED MY FIRST AMV!!!!! im proud of myself. first of all, it is my first video period. like not even smal video on windows movie player. never done one ever, ntohing. so i was a complete newbie. and i had decided to use sony vegas. now vegas is a pretty good program. not as easy as windows movie maker but much better to use to cut an dpaste and etc etc etc. but its stil VERY confusing. at least it was to me who has never made a video before. so im proud i actually finished. the only reason i actually finished it was becasue i wanted to submit it to the anime north AMV contest. i had to submit it by monday so i HAD to finish it SOON. and that us exactly what i did. i also ended up rewtaching the whole second season of nodame cantabile all over again lookign for scences and what not. so yeah you can watch my AMV here-----> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=49qsy4Cqako
sooo..should i do story???? i cant even remmeebr wher i left off. uncle was stuck in the foresdt or something? ugg dont feel like it.....sry ppl who want story if u really want me to write more then comment and tell me casue im too lazy to write it :p yeah it one of those stories....i give it up usually but its on the blog so i get reminded of it. anyway comment and tell me if u want hte story or else it'll prob die.
till next time
~POLKA DOT**
yesterday i went to izzas housie and we had na anime marthong. fun fun fun!!!
we watched the whole season of shangri-la, all 24 episodes. we also had a crisis while watchign that. so we finished episode 20 adn the aniem stoped. at first i thought it was just that i had the other eps by a diff subbers casue when u click on an ep it puts all aimilar eps in a play list. so i check and i didnt have them, so i checked m external hardrive to see if it just didnt copy properly or something. THEY WERENT THERE EITHER. WE DIDNT HAVE THE LAST 4 EPISODES. now this is a big thing, it like just ending so we NEEDED the last 4 episodes. so we ended up goign to her basement, takign the internet wire and pluging it in my laptop and download the last 3 eps and watch one online.
yes that is what we call a crisis. durign the anime marthon we had pocky, pandas, instant noodles, and pizza. YUMMYYY!!! we also watched after shangi-la, two eps of happy lesson, club to death dokuro-chan, and howl's moving castle. ok big shocker here. IZZA HAD NEVER WATCHED HOWL'S MOVING CASTLE!!! haowl's movign castle is like classic anime movie. EVERYONE has watched howl. EVERYONE! so it was like *gasp* and so we watched it but them my parents picked me up 10 minutes before the end so it was like hahaha sucker. and so izza had to watch the end by herself on the internet :P overall very fun day, it was also izza's first aniem marathon.
other than that, I FINISHED MY AMV!!!! i have said that so many times alreayd to people but im sayign it again anyway. I FINISHED MY FIRST AMV!!!!! im proud of myself. first of all, it is my first video period. like not even smal video on windows movie player. never done one ever, ntohing. so i was a complete newbie. and i had decided to use sony vegas. now vegas is a pretty good program. not as easy as windows movie maker but much better to use to cut an dpaste and etc etc etc. but its stil VERY confusing. at least it was to me who has never made a video before. so im proud i actually finished. the only reason i actually finished it was becasue i wanted to submit it to the anime north AMV contest. i had to submit it by monday so i HAD to finish it SOON. and that us exactly what i did. i also ended up rewtaching the whole second season of nodame cantabile all over again lookign for scences and what not. so yeah you can watch my AMV here-----> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=49qsy4Cqako
sooo..should i do story???? i cant even remmeebr wher i left off. uncle was stuck in the foresdt or something? ugg dont feel like it.....sry ppl who want story if u really want me to write more then comment and tell me casue im too lazy to write it :p yeah it one of those stories....i give it up usually but its on the blog so i get reminded of it. anyway comment and tell me if u want hte story or else it'll prob die.
till next time
~POLKA DOT**
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